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January 12, 2008

Comments

Tim Driscoll

Dear Elizabeth, I had intention to continue writing about rooting, and I logged on here and saw that you posted a new story, and you speak of roots right off. I do feel that I am tapping into guidance from the universe, and that the universe gives signs that become more and more fathomable the deeper I can swirl into myself. On the hour and a half train trip to Bensonhurst last Monday to get my two-hour root canal, I was at ease and even grateful to have time to read from an anthology of short stories I usually only have twenty minutes to read on my usual subway trips. The story I read was by John Barth and his story was entitled "On with the Story." As I have mentioned in previous blogs with you, I love the idea of life as a story, that we are all storytellers, that telling stories are healing and transformative, so the title of the story having the word story in it was marvelous to me before reading one word. The story is about a woman who is on an airplane and never has time to read literature although she had loved literature in school, and she has time to read because of being confined in the airplane (kind of like me in my time on the D Train). The story within the story she reads is called "Freeze Frame," and has to do with a woman who is going through the same life circumstances as the woman reading the story, and then the author of the story within the story seemingly digresses into detailing aspects of the rotation of the planet and the velocity of the galaxy, and megagalactic clusters rushing "toward some point in interclusteral space known as the Great Attractor." Now, when I read Great Attractor, of course I thought about the previous blogs you've written here in Everyday Sacred, but the sense of myself attracting this story to me at this moment in my life and the story being about a woman reading about another woman's life very similar to her own heightened my sense of being taken care of by the universe through storytelling and how stories themselves are attractive (just like when we tell someone a story and they sometimes interrupt us with one of their own). But it wasn't that I felt that sense of tingling reassuring acknowledging comfort of coincidence in the mere elements of the story. I fell in love with the author spinning a story within a story with elements of the universe in such a way that I wanted to write to him about how he deepened my faith in the power of telling a story, and I had the wondrous feeling of wholeheartedly trusting someone's soul just by the way he wrote. After the root canal was over, I realized that roots are roots whether they be my family, tribe, or ancestral roots; whether they be the rooting of root chakra, my sit bones and perineum, or whether it be the roots in my tooth. As I have mentioned before, I realize that the main thing that stops me from moving forward is my lack of being grounded and feeling the full support of the earth because I uproot myself, and I am always searching for imaginative ways to feel my sit bones better rooted. Well, because I had this dentist for two hours exposing and drilling and using that tiny instrument she sticks in and out like a little pipe cleaner, scraping out my roots and that she had to go in from the top of the tooth to get to the root, I began to explore sending energy of the same quality through the tops of my sit bones instead of trying to get them to drop more into contact with something below them as I usually do. I can drill down energy from above even while I am walking which gives me more time to get grounded than I can spend in double pigeon or sitting on the hard plastic seat of the subway.
I told a client today in reference to her own sitbones about feeling how her hamstrings could come up to spread around her sitbones, and then thought about my root canal. She said she was cold as we moved to another table for her to do a movement face down, and asked could I bring her the sweatshirt she was wearing when she came in. I got it for her and she put it on and then went face down of the table. There was a bright white logo on the back of her black sweatshirt: "Roots." On with the Story.... Love, Tim

Tim Driscoll

Dear Elizabeth, There is something occurring (and I have been drawn to the term occurring lately, which may be strongly related to the terms occult and occular, as you mention the occular tissue within the pineal gland) within me that is bringing an ease in my body which I have not felt before - or at least not within my conscious memory - it could be the way my body felt as a baby or as a child before I understood words - my muscles are beginning to feel a loving relationship to my bones. I believe I have begun to diminish what I didn't realize were varying degrees of antagonism between my musculature and the bones beneath it. I have been for many years well beyond believing or employing a primary need or impulse to have to stretch my tight muscles into supple submission and well on my way to giving the bones their full weight(and in this I feel there is a profound realization - the phrase "to give weight to" means to give something it's full importance) and it is quite a profound physiological experience to realize the paradoxical truth that when I give weight to the bones- when I give them their full weight - when I give up feeling like I have to lift or lug them around - the bones become buoyant- and to feel this - to literally "feel it in my bones" (there's a figurative phrase with not just a literal but a physiological resonance). I feel it in my bones by believing them to be alive in a way in which they have a vast and innate intelligence and wisdom and that they have intimate relationships to the joints that move them or that they deepen into and to the bones above and below them. I should call forth example by beginning with the biggest bone - the femur - my femurs lately have developed quite a giving relationship to their ball and socket joints. I am grateful that within my livelihood I must discover more ways to describe to my students how the femur deepens. Lately, I have been relating that the femur and the socket have a very giving relationship - there is 'give' in the joint in terms of there being a fluidity that when given a balance of expansion and compression (maybe that's why it can be said that there is a whole world inside your hip joints - the universe itself is in a constant state of expansion and compression) and I am now experiencing that 'give' to have not just a buoyant, bouncy, shock absorber-like physiological quality, but that it has a quality of intimate assistance - that I can deepen my femur into its hip joint in the same way I would cradle someone's head in my hands. I will continue this further. Tim

Tim Driscoll

I used to try to deepen the bones until I realized and allowed more that they already know the give and buoyancy and resilience and electromagnetic attraction inherent in their relationship - I don't even have to allow it - I just use my mind to acknowledge the intimate and even loving quality to their relationship and it occurs. This new level of enlightenment within me - the occurring - occurring being beyond allowing and well beyond doing - my bones already know - my mind creates a state in which an occurring can happen. Thus my muscles instead of feeling like they need to hold weight or stretch to support or direct the bone into some pre-conceived positioning - my muscles (and this is what I feel is profound and deserves the best detailing I can give in words) just lovingly enfold my bones. I have not had this perception before - that my muscles could have the capacity to enfold and even embrace my bones - wrap around in a cradling. The best way that I can describe the sensation is it is akin to when you allow someone you trust to really hold you - the way a baby sinks into someones arms so trustingly. My calves become cradles - my hamstrings become hammocks - my heels become cupped palms for my calcaneous bones to ease themselves into. I suppose this is a new level of self-love for me - that somehow before I believed self-love to generate in my mind and then radiate from my heart - but now I truly feel it in my bones. I love that I am drawn to look for this kind of deep meaning in these figurative phrases because I feel and am able on some level to relate a truly deep truth. This loving relationship I have between my muscles, bones and joints is changing the relationship that I feel to the floor and to the earth - my body has a more intimate loving relationship to what supports me from underneath - I can deepen into it because I know that the earth can and wishes to deepen into me. I under-stand - I stand from under, instead of feeling like I need to stand up - for myself, or for anything else. I have a trusting baby's birthright to the loving support of the earth underneath me and I feel that within our relationship, the earth has the same birthright to rise up into me. There is ease and great hope and an opening door of enlightenment here I believe. Tim


Sue

Tim, That your muscles lovingly cradle your bones... that you have an intimate, resilient and bouyant relationship with your joints, that you feel support from the earth and that you share these feelings with us feels like such a gift. Your exquisite sensitivity and unique perspective are beautiful.
How can one "see" oneself and how can one open up in the moment and communicate and respond in the richest, fullest manner possible. How can one take those intimate loving feelings you express and feel them with other people, with work, with one's ideas. Is it possible to capture through becoming the "archtype" in a yoga pose where you overcome all your body's idiosyncratic irregularities or places where the energy has gotten trapped as Elizabeth discussed in class... is that the moment when we become free to see what is outside and what is inside, free of the fantasies about what people think of us. Because I want to wrap my mind in the feelings that you have described through your body. I want to feel grounded and connected in my muscles and joints, in my thoughts and dreams, in my relationships with people and my effort to change. Thank you Elizabeth and Tim for your encouragement to grow. Sue


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